How to apologize to your girlfriend

Question

I have hurt my girlfriend deeply and now she refuses to talk to me. She takes different routes to avoid me at school and purposefully avoids my texts. How do I offer a sincere apology to my girlfriend?

Answer 1

If you have something really good to say, but you don’t know if she will listen, you should force her to listen. This does not mean ambushing her in some sort of surprise “attack.” This move may actually provoke her further. But you do want to be firm and seek the opportunity to state your position.

Start by stating your position as quickly as possible. State plainly that you want to apologize if she listens. Add that she can accept or reject the apology if she wants, but she should at least hear you out.

Do not be soft or shy about the encounter. Being firm about the situation is the necessary step to take responsibility for a misdeed.

Answer 2

The biggest part is what to say in the apology. I recommend you to write down the apology before setting up the meeting. Convince yourself that you truly are sorry. If you are a naturally shy person, you want to feel comfortable with what you say and reduce the chances of making blunders.

There are usually three parts of an apology: the expression of guilt, the acceptance of responsibility and the righting of a wrong. The biggest part is admitting that you were wrong. Next, accept responsibility for your actions, which leads to the last step, correcting your mistake.

Edit your apology after you write it out in full. Do not pretend like you are writing an essay for school because then you will be dishonest. It is important that you appear sincere without sounding generic.

Answer 3

I don’t think people here really have the right to teach you how to apologize to your girlfriend. But do remember: apologize to your girlfriend in person. It is the age of modern technology, but using technology to apologize for a bad deed is not recommended. Many girlfriends are offended by breakup tweets just as much as they are offended by apology tweets. So, skip social media this one time to apologize in person.

Only use your phone to set up a meeting. When you make the effort to do this, you show your true sincerity and desire to change. Sending a text through the phone is a sign of laziness and incompetency. It shows that you are trying to hide something. Worst of all, she gets the impression that you are not really sorry at all, which I’m sure is not what you want to see.